What an emotional time this is for me. Posting this blog is very therapeutic.
I have moments of absolute bliss. I look at this baby, sleeping at 11:30 in the morning, and any other problem I am facing is absolute nonsense.
Just look at him. How is he mine? How am I so lucky? Again.
He does a lot more sleeping than Wolfgang did. I like that about him. :)
But when he IS awake (like from 3 to 6 in the morning), he is a crabby patty.
And I am a crabby patty.
I was reading my journal from the month after Wolfgang was born and it was so much harder than this.
Right now, I have all the help in the world with Wolfgang. Its so nice.
But I'm healing a lot slower. Its hard not being able to pick up my Guggy Gooster. I miss him. I can't wait to be able to carry him out to the car or into the bathroom or up to the dining table. I miss his chubby little self.
So there are the hormones that make me cry. There is the pain and the being awake at 3 in the morning that makes me cry.
I do a LOT of crying. Mostly in the evening when I feel the worst.
And I miss the Wolf.
This time will end soon enough and I'll be able to help all the overworked people who are picking up my slack. Until then, gimme some Kleenex.